Today's Headlines

The Korea Herald, JoongAng Daily and Dong-A Ilbo all lead today's online editions with a story on President Lee's proposal for a "Unification Tax" to prepare for the costs of the inevitable fall of the North Korean regime and the costs that will ensue.

The No. 2 story across the paps is yesterday's Gwanghwamun reopening ceremonies, after the gate was burned down by a mentally ill man in 2008. The celebration coincided with Korean Liberation Day, marking 65 years of Korean independence from Japanese colonization.

The Korea Times, of course, ignored all that historic stuff, and topped its frontpage with Woman claims Donald Duck groped her breasts. Stay classy, KT.

April Magolon, from Upper Darby, Delaware, says the incident happened when she visited the Florida theme park with her fiancé and kids in May 2008. She said she was holding one of her children and trying to get the character’s autograph.
A 38-page lawsuit has been filed in Orlando, claiming Magolon feels traumatized two years on, suffering from anxiety, headaches, nausea, cold sweats, insomnia, nightmares, flashbacks and digestive problems, according the media.

This kind of story appears every few years but, alas, there's usually nothing much in it. I am not attempting to make light of actual abuse, but this is pretty much hooey. First of all, in this case, Donald Duck is almost always portrayed by a woman, since it is one of the smaller characters. Secondly, the "cast member" inside most any mascot suit has an extremely limited range of vision; Disney characters have handlers for that reason. Further, the "groper's" hands are contained in a rather thick costume--the sensation to be achieved is minimal to non-existent. More debunking of the fondling mascot can be found at Slate.

By the way, here I am being goosed by Bugs Bunny, in Spring 2003--I had repressed the memory until just now. I'll be announcing the lawsuit shortly; stay tuned to these pages.