TMI

Right on the heels of receiving the results of my health check-up in the mail today, I read this story in the Korea Times about a toilet that can perform some of those functions for you, while you perform your own, uh, functions:

The toilet bowl invented by students from the Kun Shan University and Southern Taiwan University measures the user's weight, body fat and heart rate, TV channel TVBS reported.
The measurement, taking only 30 seconds, begins as soon as a person sits. A printer on top of the water tank behind the bowl prints measurements.

Personally, I think it should measure weight at the end of the procedure, so to speak.

Korea has its own hi-tech toilets (just go to YouTube and search on "Korean toilet") but nothing that takes your vital statistics.

Speaking of which (vital statistics, that is), I spent about an hour with my phone's dictionary translating what I could from the four-page medical report. Mine turned out to be not so bad: as I mentioned in the previous post, my blood pressure has come down a bit, but is still high; cholesterol is good, blood sugar normal, triglycerides fine, liver function normal (go figure), brain normal (what?)

There were several things I couldn't interpret, but the only thing they bothered to translate into English was this:

You have an inflammation on duodenum, so would be better not to take somewhat spicy or salty food from now on. We recommend you would rather visit gastroenterologist if any symptom of stomach such as heartburn, belching, postprandial pain.

I already avoid salty foods, and I doubt it is even possible to survive in Korea if you don't eat spicy. And I wouldn't want to. Besides, spices are a healthy way to get good flavor in food without resorting to butter, cream, oil and other unhealthy choices. Furthermore, I practically never have any of the symptoms described.

Of course, I am continuing to hit the gym regularly; plus some alumnus of Young-il Go made a gift to the teachers of a pair of gloves (very handy now it's cold) and a little clip-on pedometer. "For your health, for your health!" Principal Jun enthused when he gave it to me. Based on three days' data, I average about 7.5 km per day, most of it to and from school, of course. That's around 500 calories burned.

Health nut? Not yet. Total slob whose only exercise is walking to and from car? Not any more.

This and That

1) Yesterday during sixth period, it was Open House, meaning mothers come in to observe in classes. Guess when I found out it was Open House? Yesterday, after fourth period. Surprise.

Now, I have no problem with anyone observing my class, anytime. I'm not going to change my lesson plan, or anything like that. However, knowing in advance, I would be sure to dress less casually--best foot forward and all that. Fortunately, I was rather nattily attired yesterday, but that's not the point.

Further, I am proactive in asking my co-teachers on Friday about any special events or anything that might effect my classes in the coming week. But not a word. As consolation, Mr Lee assured me that the mothers who sat in my class (7 or 8) were very satisfied.

2) Interesting article in today's NYT about why it's so hard to lose weight despite regular exercise (and yes, I watch my calories, too):

The Denver researchers were especially interested in how the athletes’ bodies would apportion and use calories. It has been well documented that regular endurance training increases the ability of the body to use fat as a fuel during exercise. They wondered, though, if the athletes — or any of the other subjects — would burn extra fat calories after exercising, a phenomenon that some exercisers (and even more diet and fitness books) call “afterburn.” ...
To their surprise, the researchers found that none of the groups, including the athletes, experienced “afterburn.” They did not use additional body fat on the day when they exercised. In fact, most of the subjects burned slightly less fat over the 24-hour study period when they exercised than when they did not.

Still, you can design your workout to maximize the amount of body fat you burn. I had this conversation with the fitness guy at my gym last week, when he told me to slow down on the stationary bike--I do 2 min. really hard (above 40 km/h), then slow down a bit for 3 min. (between 34 and 36 km/h), over a period of 25 min. Then I do 5 and 5 in similar fashion on the elliptical trainer for 25 min.

I pointed out to him that to drop this fat (or "pa-duh"), I need a heart rate of at least 125. Which is what I get (the machines have pulse monitors). It's true I get red in the face, but I can still talk while working, I don't get dizzy or feel excessively weak, and I sweat up a storm. The article has this to say:

“If you work out at an easy intensity, you will burn a higher percentage of fat calories” than if you work out a higher intensity, Carey says, so you should draw down some of the padding you’ve accumulated on the hips or elsewhere — if you don’t replace all of the calories afterward. To help those hoping to reduce their body fat, he published formulas in The Journal of Strength and Conditioning Research last month that detailed the heart rates at which a person could maximize fat burning. “Heart rates of between 105 and 134” beats per minute, Carey said, represent the fat-burning zone. “It’s probably best to work out near the top of that zone,” he says, “so that you burn more calories over all” than at the extremely leisurely lower end.

I may print this off and take it to him. His English is poor, but he is motivated to improve, and armed with a dictionary, I think he can get through it. My Achilles' Heel remains the chicken hof--Korean fried chicken is awesome! A new hof opened in my building where the seafood place was, and I'm sure I'll be able to give you a review soon.

3) Of all the fruit trees you can grow, Seoulites seem to choose the 감 gam, persimmon, above all others. I pass a dozen persimmon trees growing in people's small yards each day, and this is the time of year when they get ripe. They must be bletted before consumption, so don't go picking them as you pass by and crunching down. Here are a few photos:

Tuttle News Wrap

1) I went to a trivia contest in Itaewon (American expat/military area) at 3 Alley Pub. It had a different format than I've seen before: the host asks questions, you write down your answers--all on one sheet. Then at the end of the game, you turn in your answer sheet, and he redistributes them for grading. But you don't have to put GHB on it ...

So there were 50 questions, beginning with 10 visual ones on the back side of the answer sheet. Then there were 10 questions in each of 4 categories. That's it; no wagering points, no final question, no drama.

On the whole, the questions were rather mundane, but I liked one category pretty well: Food and Drink in Song, with answers like Cream, Meatloaf and Cheeseburger in Paradise. I was hoping for Strawberry Alarm Clock, but no such luck.

I had a problem with one question, though--well, the answer, actually. The category was sports, the question described a hack--kicking another player about the shins or ankles--and asked what this was called in the rules. The answer had to be either kicking or tripping, but he said it was hacking. No, I maintained, that's the colloquial term, not the official name of the foul. At least it wasn't two years ago. I'm not going to cite my qualifications in soccer, but they are not inconsiderable.

My teammates badgered me into confronting him about it. Now, as a former trivia host and writer myself, this is something I don't like to do: you will not win. So I just asked him where he had got that information. "I checked on the FIFA website this morning," he assured me. Well, I checked it out that evening, when I got home, downloading the 2008/2009 Laws of the game here: http://www.fifa.com/mm/document/affederation/federation/81/42/36/lotg_en.pdf. A search does not turn up the terms "hack" or "hacking". Look at Law 12, Fouls and Misconduct, beginning on page 35.

That one point cost us the game--or at least a three-way tie for first. Plus, he made fun of our "wrong" answer!

2) The Job Fair lesson I wrote about earlier continued to be a success all week--by Wednesday, the whole school knew about it, and classes generally came in chomping at the bit. Even students who didn't want to get interviewed at first ended up jostling to get back in for another go.

This has emboldened me a little bit--I'm going to try another "station" activity in a few weeks: "Murder in London" a mystery set in late Victorian times, wherein pairs of students acting as detective teams (a la Holmes and Watson) will have to read information, examine evidence, and perhaps interview witnesses. After they visit a station, they have to decide where to go next, like in the "Choose Your Own Adventure" books.

3) I'm in my chicken hof enjoying some fried chicken mild-uh and ma-shillin' some maekchu while watching Kia Tigers whip up on the LG Twins. It was 4 -2 Kia at the top of the 8th with one out. Half an hour later, the score is 12 - 2.

4) I only let myself do this after putting in the correct number of visits to the fitness center, where today I did 30.2 km on the machines. I lost 1.2 kg in the last 10 days. Someday, someone will ask me if I've lost some weight recently. I'll say, "Yes, I have--but I found most of it downstairs at the chicken hof."

Tuttle Update for April 17

Hola, amigos! I know it's been a while since last time I rapped at ya, but I've been busy tryin' to keep myself dry in the shitstorm. [/classic Jim Anchower opening]

So, I have been watching the progress on my classroom--while faster than paint drying, it's still been plenty slow. In fact, my room won't be ready on Monday! The guys who hook up the SmartBoard will be in "next week". Chrissakes!

Still, I went and dropped about 70 grand on a half-dozen plants in Deungchon market to really make it look nice. I'll post pictures once I actually teach in the new room. Though I can tell you now it will be a pain to keep tidy, since, instead of tables, I have individual student desks, arranged in tables of four. The kids will constantly displace them, meaning I will spend five minutes after every class straightening up.

In other news, it is my opinion that the studio version of "London Calling" by The Clash is the best tune ever for pounding out the clicks on the elliptical trainer. I am no longer adding time to my workout--25 min on the stationary bike, 15 on the treadmill, and 35 on the elliptical. Instead, I try to increase the distance or the setting. Three months ago I thought I'd never exceed 19 km/h on that elliptical, nowadays I try not to go under 24. Progress is slowest on the treadmill, where pain in my left calf is still really limiting. I dl'ed a free exercise tracker at the beginning of the month to keep track. I wish I had dl'ed more weight by now, though!

I am writing to you from the main room of my favorite chicken hof while eating some fried chicken mild-uh and consuming mass quantities. I like this place. The food is great, the service good (for Korea) and they don't seem to mind this strange waygookin taking up a whole table and typing on his laptop. I can't wait until they start setting up tables on the sidewalk again--should be any day now, but we had a little cold snap in the second half of the week.

This weekend, after two straight at the ballpark, I'll be staying home, or at least closer to home. I may venture out to the Yeouido Festival during daylight--stay tuned to this channel for more!

Tuttle News Update

1) Both lesson plans went really well on Day 1--so they are definitely worth stealing from me. The true test is the afternoon classes on Tuesday, but I have high hopes.

2) I downloaded some tunes and put them on the mp3 player, and took it to the fitness center. Really good move, I'm pleased to say--the session just flew by! Still awaiting playlist suggestions ...

3) Those of us in SMOE Team 3 got an email from our team leader at 2:14 pm today informing us that we have a co-teacher training session on Wed., from 3 to 6 pm. Consider it mandatory. Hard to figure how you do that when you've only given 48 hrs and 46 min. of prior notice. This is a classic example of the way things are done in the Seoul educational system.

Now I already knew about this, because my co-teacher told me on Thursday or so. It was, I'm sure, my email to David M for confirmation--since neither I nor any of my cohorts had heard anything--that prompted his announcement.

But, most annoyingly, this is after the native teacher group complained loudly at the previous one of these junkets about how poorly notification was handled.

4) So, there's this weird kid who I don't even teach since he is in the math/science stream in second grade (but I remember him from winter camp) who has been hanging around my office at the end of lunch time, wanting to talk to me. Now, I got nuthin' agin somebody what wants to better hisself, but this kid sits in the unoccupied chair opposite my desk and asks me a lot of intrusive questions. And doesn't take a hint. Hint, hell, he hardly even takes a direct command.

Today he brought in a script he had written out for us to read together, rather ungrammatical (but as I say, I don't worry a lot about that, hopefully it comes in due time), but here's the weird part (okay, the really weird part): he plays a customs agent, and I play someone he suspects of trying to smuggle in cocaine.

I try to explain to him that it's insulting to suggest that just because I'm American I would play a cocaine dealer, and that furthermore, you can't smell cocaine on someone's breath.

In Part 2, yes there's a Part 2, he plays someone who uses iDoser, which is the computer age's version of alpha-wave feedback therapy momentarily popular in the early seventies. The idea was, and is, to "synchronize your brainwaves". Or in at least one case, to addle them.

Bonus Photograph: The Icaremewellbeingcafe has just opened a couple blocks away on my walk to work. The hangeul sounds out as "Ah-ee kae-aw mee".

The Coming Week

So, here I am at the chicken hof, having completed my lesson plans and done all the other things I am supposed to do.

In first grade, we will continue to focus on technology--specifically, the cellphone. We will begin by practicing some common phone phrases, then in pairs rank the features of cellphones: is a camera more important, or current weather conditions, or GPS, or texting, etc? In the final activity, students will write five GOOD questions about cellphone use, then conduct a poll of their fellow students. They will then report their results back to their table.

Somewhere in there, we will listen to the following song, whose lyrics I have transcribed into the powerpoint:


Second graders (that's HS juniors, in case you've forgotten) are continuing a unit on Western music. This week, we will turn to criticism, and examine the question of whether ART can be evaluated simply in terms of good and bad. Is a Classical conductor inherently better than a pop singer? Is representational art superior in any sense to abstract works, or to the line drawings Picasso used to capture the essence of a thing in a few strokes?


Click here to check out a cool study of Picasso's progression to this image.

Rather than giving a thumbs up or thumbs down, we try to be more subtle, using adjectives to describe our reactions to some artwork. I will play some music clips, each embedded in a slide that details the type of response I want them to write about: Rhapsody In Blue, Faint by Linkin Park, Winter from Vivaldi's Four Seasons and Bongo Bong from Manu Chao:


In other news, I finally bought an MP3 player (since I never got around to it on my trip to China); now I'm looking for music to make a couple of killer workout playlists. The whole reason I wanted one is because the continuous stream of K-Pop in the fitness center, while lively, just doesn't do it for me. And TB's proposal for looping 'Eye of the Tiger' isn't quite what I had in mind.

Suggestions are encouraged.

The Rumor Mill

Yesterday being Friday, my teaching day ended at 12:30, so I went home and took a nap, worked on some lesson plan ideas, etc, before going to the gym for a "moderate-to-heavy workout" of 28 km (14 each) on the elliptical trainer and the stationary bike. Add about fourteen minutes on the treadmill and a couple of water breaks before walking up seven (that's 7) flights of stairs to the third floor, that's nearly an hour and a half.

It's taken me months to get to this point, and my weight change is still marginal, but--I do actually feel better. I ran to cross the street before the light changed the other day, and I wasn't even winded! Gweon Keun-yer 권근열 (English name I gave him: Jeremy), the young guy in charge of the gym, has expressed his pleasure in my limited progress using his limited English. He notes hopefully that my face is thinner--which is often the first place weight change is visible.

Anyway, so I come upstairs and my phone (which I don't take down to the gym with me) is making the sound it makes for a missed call. I call back, and it's Mr Wright, actually Lee Sang Hyeong 이상형, following up on his invitation earlier in the week to go out drinking.

Well, I have to shower, etc, and end up meeting at 8:00 near the school at a Western hof called Adonis which has a pirate statue and a Civil War soldier statue out front. Yeah, transplant that set up to America and you have the gayest gay bar in Gay Town. Moving on ...

Pey-ga go pai-yo, I'm hungry. So's he, so we order some chicken and chat; meanwhile, some fellow Young-il teachers start to trickle in. The Research Dept has had a "meeting" nearby, so Mr Pak the assistant principal, big Mr Lee, Lee Geum-cheon and couple of other major players come in.

Very soon, they get to the point: they are disappointed to hear that I do not want to come back to Young-il next year. I ask where they heard that, since no one has even asked me.

It seems someone in the administration office has started a rumor to that effect. I made it very clear that this was untrue, that I had thought for some time on the issue and had decided that I would re-sign at Young-il if a contract was offered to me. But so far, no contract had been offered.

I explained my calculus on both sides: on the plus side, everyone at the school has been kind and supportive to me, and they take education seriously; my officetel, though small, is well-located, near the school, across the street from E-Mart, and I can't wait until line 9 opens!


On the negative side, I explained that I am often frustrated in attempting to do my job--that is, get students to speak English, whether to the whole class or just to one other person. I spend hours, I said, consulting the best sources, developing interesting lessons, often to no avail. I meet students once a week, so I have little chance to get to know them.

Anyway, I told them, with Mr Wright and Mr Lee interpreting, I will not stay in Korea for too many years, I will go home to America. My experience has kind of spoiled me, since I know from my friends I am lucky to work with such good people. Even so, I want to experience other parts of Korea outside Seoul, perhaps, or maybe someplace else in Asia, "as long as I am here". They understood.

But at least for next year, I plan to teach at Young-il, despite what they have heard from the rumor mill.

Nerdiness in the Cause of Peace Isn't That Bad

I went to the fitness center today for the first time in yonkies, and still managed to do okay, though my calf muscle seems to have taken a few steps backward due to disuse. Fitness guy didn't even ask where I've been, though I had my excuses prepared--in pidgin/charade format.

I had planned to go the Chinese consulate today to get my visa for the upcoming China trip, but I noticed at the webpage that they are closed today--many things in Seoul were closed Sun., Mon. and Tues. due to Seollal, but this is the only place I know of that extended it through today. This was on their 2009 table of closings, where the Dec. 25 closing was announced as due to "Korean festival". April 6 is "Tomb-sweeping Day."

Incidentally, here are directions to the Chinese Consulate, from our friends at travelchinaguide.com:

Take Subway No.4 Line, exit at Exit No.3 of Myeong-dong Subway Station, then walk about 400 meters (437.4 yards) toward Namsan. The Consular Office is close to the Ticket Office of Namsan Cable Car Station.

Do you see what they've done? They've taken a measurement that is approximated to the first significant figure (400 m), then converted that measure to a result that has four sig. figs (437.4 yds). Appalling!

I mean, I did 6.2 km on the elliptical today (will have to start building back up) but that doesn't mean I did exactly 3.90072 miles. The fact that the readout is calibrated in tenths necessarily means any conversion can only have the same precision. Precision, of course, has a particular meaning in measurement, as does accuracy; but you knew that--so why didn't the folks at travelchinaguide.com?

Before we go any further, I also spent time on the treadmill and the stationary bike. Alas, converting from pounds to kilograms doesn't really change the outcome so far by much--though I have cinched up my belts a hole or two (count numbers are absolute since there's no measurement uncertainty).

The title of this post comes from a quote by Nixon: "Paranoia in the cause of peace isn't that bad." Or something close, though my google-fu has failed me. If you know what I'm going for, please send a comment to straighten me out. TIA (thanks in advance). But you know that.

Bonus Photograph: Snow in Itaewon.